It's been seven weeks since my last Ayahuasca trip. I just got back from a 10-day Vipassana meditation retreat and wanted to test out how it would potentially affect my journey. So here we go.
Participants: Jarvis (the facilitator), May (the assistant), Edna (Israeli man in his 40-50s)
1st Dose
I started off with a relatively low dose, 1/2 a dixie cup. Then I got into half lotus meditation posture and waited for the initial onset. 30 minutes in, I didn't really feel anything aside from a flashing, strobing, and pulsing white light in the middle of my forehead. No big deal, this occurs here and there when I meditate sober.
2nd Dose
Then Jarvis asked us if we were ready to follow it up with another dose. I think he was able to tell it was not really kicking in. So this time, we proceeded with a fuller dose. So a total of 1.5 shots. Not too long after I took this dose, the affects of Ayahuasca began.
The inner world visuals started to commence. I'm not sure if it's because of the Vipassana retreat, but my inner world journey was no where near as chaotic or intense as my previous ones. Perhaps the retreat purified my mind a bit. No crazy melting paint like substances, no strange realms or dimensions, and no HD like images or inner world entities. There were brief blue-gold-white kaleidoscopic or fractal like visuals. It was coupled by a duck like quacking noise trying to speak to me. "Quack quack quackkk quack quack...", something I've encountered many times in my other trips. Not really seeing much, I decided to keep my eyes open.
Then the urge came to purge. So I quickly got outside and puked my guts out. Puking, I was able to see dark entities and dark energies within and around my puke. Again, this is a fairly common thing to see for people and generally I don't give it too much attention. As usual, I feel lighter after, walking about, feeling like a tall being or spirit. I then went back inside to sit down in the center of the studio.
I'm not sure what the Vipassana retreat did, but it seem to have really grounded me. My trip was not as cosmic or astral as it was in the past where I felt like I was floating out in a dream like space in the universe. Nor did I feel puffed up like I was something walking around greater than myself, the energy in me was more contained this time.
As I went and sat inside the room, I did however have two occurrences of explosive energy release. I'm not sure why this happens to me. According to May, she hasn't seen any other patron do this. I would sit there and a ball full of energy would build up inside of me and it would need to be released. As it gets released, the energy would pour out of my mouth and I would bellow a deep loud roar filling the entire room. Ayahuasca overtakes me and does this to me. Very powerful stuff, a very immense feeling of release. I'd burst forth with my arms and neck outstretched in the air unleashing vibration and vocal energy.
Not too long after, a second round of purging came. I'm guessing each purge was associated to each of the spaced out doses I took. After this purge, I felt even lighter than before and a sense of confidence, sureness of myself, and presence began to grow and well up inside of me. My true being and spirit began to express itself, casting away the limitations of the mind-body. My mind was clear and I felt highly aware and highly connected. A heightened sense of awareness. I was able to detect subtle sensations all over my body. Mentally sharp and sober with the affects of Ayahuasca still in my system, I felt radiating and glowing. I walked back into the studio and started noticing a gathering of spirits all around me.
The whole room was filled with heavenly spirits with astral bodies. They looked pretty much like the wisps I experienced in my last Ayahuasca trip, only this time their arms and legs were much more prominent and they weren't flying about in the air. They were circling around me at ground level, here and there, scattered all over the room. This time both male and female. They looked amazing and beautiful, very light and transparent. Each with a different personality too. Some were graceful, some were giddy, another was calm, and there was also even an obnoxious male one that enjoyed getting really close to the right side of my face trying to playfully bug me. Previously, I've always had doubts and figured I was just hallucinating, but now I have growing confidence that these entities do exist. They were as clear as night and day, as me seeing another person in front of me. I was looking onward at each and one of them with mental clarity. It felt like I was at some party and they came to congregate and celebrate. To show me that I made it to their realm. That was the feeling I got from them, a great welcoming. They all seemed genuine, happy, and friendly. Not needy and wanting something like the ones I encountered on my 5 gram mushroom trip, where I felt a bit of fear. This lasted about 10 to 15 minutes. As the affects of Ayahuasca began to fade, so did they.
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| This picture does not do them justice, but it was the best one I could find. |
I'm truly grateful and thankful for Ayahuasca to allow me to experience this. It was wonderful, delightful, and full of joy.
https://www.meetup.com/AyahuascaDTLA/events/246822118/
