Magic Mushrooms: Terrence Mckenna's Heroic Dose (Faceless Beings with Ethereal Lantern Lights)

🕒 7 MINUTE READ

I know this is supposed to be an Ayahuasca blog, but I decided to give a trip report on what they call Terrence Mckenna's Heroic Dose. It's basically 5 grams of magic mushrooms in total silent darkness. I will write about some of the differences between this journey and my Ayahuasca trips.

Around 7 PM, I prepared my room by turning off all electronics and blocking anything that might be emanating light. By the time I was done, it was 7:55 PM and began munching on 5 grams of mushrooms. Chewed them thoroughly and proceeded to meditate on my bed.

About 30 minutes in, I began to see lightly colored visuals in string forms and silhouettes. Nothing intense or high definition like Ayahuasca. However, as it progressed and peaked, I started seeing various close eyed visuals I generally see when I'm on Ayahuasca. It was the other side. A side I've gotten familiar with. This seems to be some midway realm between our physical one and the spiritual. One key note that was different with mushrooms was that it lacked the divine light or energy I typically see or feel on Ayahuasca. I did notice there was no nausea that I usually get with a regular 3.5 gram dose walking around in nature. Oh, and thank god no purge!

As the intensity progressed, I got out of meditation and laid in my bed. Phasing in and out of open eyed and closed eyed visuals, it was difficult to really make out what was in the dark. But I started to see open eyed shadowy figures zooming and flying about the room, getting pretty close to me, especially around my neck. Sometimes I can make out a face, other times I couldn't. Was a bit freaky, but I continued to look on with curiosity and figured it's just my mind playing tricks on me in the dark.

We are all ONE right? Everything is consciousness right? Just mind stuff. Nothing to be scared of right?

So I got into a bow, the posture of surrender. To open myself up for whatever may come. In that position, with my eyes closed, I tapped into the mid way realm again and saw various geometric bubbles and patterns, and what sort of looked like some presence was in there, but it wasn't clear. Having enough of that I sat upright in my bed.

Then appeared in the darkness, near the edge of my bed to my left, this very low light, a luminescent glow. It seemed to be in some sort of ethereal box. Then another appeared. Then I realized, these lantern like lights were being held up by these tall, shadowy-grayish, looming, masculine, ethereal, semi-faceless beings with long arms. Staring at them for a bit, they didn't seem to move much but definitely were present. It did not feel like a figment of my imagination or hallucination. They appeared to be very real. They then held the light up to me and continued to stare at me, and I back at them. Then a third one appeared, now three of them each holding up this light. Each of them, different heights. Shortly after, more came into my room, now they were feminine, and some were children. The females and kids did not have the lantern like ethereal light that the masculine ones were holding. The children moved faster and swirled about. All of them seemed to be hungry or wanting something, I don't know what, perhaps energy? It was like when you come across a bunch of homeless, pan handlers, and beggars asking for change. They definitely showed a lot of curiosity in me.

I was telling myself, there's nothing to be afraid of. Everything is of the mind. So I tried to be welcoming and compassionate. Like the Buddha said, be compassionate towards all sentient beings. When I started to be more welcoming, it started to get a little overwhelming, very claustrophobic. They were swarming me wanting something, but I had enough. They were getting too close and it got very uncomfortable so I stood up, puffed up my chest and told them "No". Tried to clear the air and went to reach for the light as I started to feel fear. I just didn't want to mess with energies I did not understand. As I reached for the light, they started grasping me not wanting me to turn on the lights. I couldn't feel them, but I could see it. It definitely got a little creepy. Pretty fucken intense.

they were longer, taller, less muscular, less defined

As the lights went on, everything in my apartment had no lines. Every object looked like some fuzzy blob. Things got better as my eyes adjusted to the light. With the lights on, everything looked pretty and HD, kind of like when I'm on Ayahuasca but not to that level of detail.

This was not the first time I chickened out seeing entities. Here's an excerpt from my Ayahuasca Journey 8.

"So I proceeded to close my eyes and had my first encounter with some strange cosmic entities or spirits. There were three of them, gender-less. They were long swirly thick oval looking non-slimy very smooth wormy beings. They looked at me with curiosity and I stared right back. Then they made a sudden shift and started approaching me, way too close to my comfort. As if they were going to posses me, so I opened my eyes, shook myself out of that vision and said no thanks. Did not feel comfortable surrendering to that."

Anyway, I spent the remainder of my trip sitting on my bed contemplating what I had just experienced. On the come down though, the oneness feeling started to arise. At the end of all my psychedelic trips, it seems to always want to teach me that everything is one, no separation. A light luminous glow or aura pervades the room. It's as if my being can feel the edges of consciousness. As if, all manifestation and existence resides within my very being. That is oneness and what all psychedelics ultimately try to teach.

Hope you enjoyed this report! This is my 6th mushroom trip, first time trying 5 grams.

Ayahuasca Journey 10: Playful Female Spirits "Wisps"

🕒 6 MINUTE READ

Been three weeks since my last trip, so I've been itching to experience grace, cosmic consciousness, and the Self. Once again, I decided to embark on another Ayahuasca journey, my 10th one.

First Dose
Got to the ceremony and was handed my dose. I took it right away and went back to my usual spot and laid there, waiting for its onset. About 30 minutes in, the visuals came but were fairly weak. Not solid or dense visuals, but more linear. Not the usual waxy, paint like melting substance I often see. This time, lot more lines and colors with something guiding me to go down a stream of two sets of multiple vibrating parallel lines. Not feeling much, I opened my eyes to see if there were any open eye differences. Looking around, nothing all too special or out of the norm, just extreme clarity. Now being almost 45 minutes in and not tripping hard yet, I decided to follow-up with a 2nd dose.

Second Dose
Not too long after taking my second dose, my inner world visuals began coming more alive. Again with the first dose, Mother Aya lead me down the center of a bunch of wiggling vibrating opposing parallel lines of different colors. So I followed. To the left and right of these lines I saw various hellish and morbid type images, but they weren't very prominent. They were more in the background so I didn't place much emphasis on them. As I continued swirling through the center of these parallel lines, I could feel acceleration and energy building up in my body. When I finally got to the destination, this energy rushed throughout my body emanating from the core of my being. I exploded out of my position laying down, got up, and was super expansive and flexed, puffed up like a balloon. Mother Aya had take over. As I continued to well up and the energy built up in my core continued to surge, it suddenly burst forth erupting all over. An orgasm of the body and mind, an orgasm of my being. A brain-body-gasm! My whole being shuddered and expanded with energy. Vibrations came pouring out of my mouth and I let out a deep bellied shout. I felt like a human bomb filled with life force. When it was all done, I couldn't stop chuckling in joy. It was exhilarating. I felt sooo alive.

 

After that experience, I tucked myself back into my spot. Feeling super cozy and giddy as I stared into empty space. Out of no where, these spirits started appearing. I looked first with curiosity and cleared my eyes to look again, just to make sure I saw what I was seeing. There they were, half a dozen of them. Female spirits with astral bodies floating all over the room. They were happy, playful, and filled with joy. Smiling, gleeful, flirtatious, and fun. They were like playful dolphins, only that they were levitating and swirling above. Then it was apparent to me, either I was hallucinating very hard or they were astral beings without a physical body. Entities from a non physical plane of existence. They were very ethereal, but I was able to make out their pretty giggling faces. They were a lot like wisps, only light, white, and yellowish with lengthy trailing astral bodies. It was very magical, wonderful, and pleasant to watch. Ayahuasca truly does show you some amazing stuff. I've had so many out of this world encounters and visions with Ayahuasca, I wish I had the artistic talent to draw out what I see. Unfortunately I can't draw if my life depended on it. Hence I'm writing.

Not too long after my encounter with the wisps, a 2nd round of energy began to build up in my body and mind again. Once again it exploded sending my legs and arms outstretched while i bellowed vibrations out of my mouth from my gut causing my whole being to shiver with bliss. Immediately after, I felt one with everything that was around. That there was was no separation, wholeness, complete. I found it once again, the Self. Shining every so subtlety, incredible easy to miss. It's as if Ayahuasca allows you to fine tune into this luminous Self, an invisible energy field, and it's there, perceivable when you tap in. Glowing within you and without. Grace, God, Guru is always with you. Sitting there feeling one with everything, a deep and profound peace permeated the entire room. I basked in that essence, that presence, this silence, the ego-less state. It was pure bliss. It was ecstatic. This is everything Ramana Maharshi speaks of. He truly was a saint, a Buddha of our time.

Ramana Maharashi - the Self

I picked up a mirror I had brought and looked at my face. Looking into it, I felt a sense of separation from the body. Once again, Ayahuasca teaching me that I'm not the body, but the eternal being, pure awareness. Seeing myself in the mirror, it felt like another person. A person aging with wrinkles, getting old. A body prone to disease, death, and decay. It was clear to me, to truly wake up and discover our true nature, is the ultimate and highest goal that every being should pursue. To escape the cycle of Samsara. To break the illusion of Maya. To transcend the physical realm and be in touch with our true selves once again. To abide as the ONE eternal spirit. If not this lifetime, then the next.

P.S. I had one hell of a deep purge. Glad that parts over.